Outrage!!!

Terrible news has reached us from the desperados holding Curly Bob hostage. Avid readers of this blog will recall the threat made by the head of the gang called  “Las Patas Negras” (The Black Paws), saying failure to comply with their ransom demands would result in  sending me one of Bob’s ears. The photo below, received by email, shows they  meant what they said.

Failure to pay up pronto, (a bandit expression), will result in the other ear  being sent via the post while Bob stays in the jungle.

We have been overwhelmed  by donations of honey and chocolate sent in by Bob’s fans and bear lovers all over the world. Meanwhile specially trained hostage negotiators are flying to the Yucatan as we speak.

Despite his horrific injury Bob  has sent me instructions, via his captors, to publish another 2 paintings for his ever growing audience to remember him by. he can’t use his bear friendly IPad to communicate any more as the battery has gone flat.

On Bob’s behalf I wish to express our gratitude for all the donations to the ransom fund and messages of support.

We can only hope Las Patas Negras have some measure of decency and will return what appears to remain of Curly Bob to us very soon .

The paintings requested by Bob are  “Boats at Low Tide” and

“Boats at Rest, Norfolk” both of which are oils on canvas. Any more news will be posted as soon as it is received.

Vanbear7

pp Curly Bob

He’s Alive!

Great news at last,  Bob is alive and well. Via email,  Bob tells me he and his pals are all in good health.

Las Patas Negras (The Black Paws)  who prey on helpless bears have allowed Bob to use his specially adapted IPad to communicate their ransom demands. These are  100kgs of honey, marshmallows and chocolate. They have asked for “Fairtrade“  brands only ( it seems even these villains have some ethics).

If their demands are not met within a week the dastardly swine have said they will send one of Bob’s ears as proof of their intentions.  I explained to Bob that the British Government’s official position is that it does not negotiate with terrorists. Bob explained, in somewhat forceful terms, how this is a short sighted approach especially as he doesn’t want his fur marked or kapok spilled.

It is ironic that Bob’s blog became so popular in a short space of time.  The bandits now realise he is a bear of standing with over 300 fans worldwide and have increased their ransom demands accordingly.

Having devoted his life to charity fundraising Bob has no money of his own (he lives with me rent free). Therefore  a world wide appeal is being launched for donations of honey, chocolate and marshmallows. Bob’s safety may well depend upon the generosity of bear and art  lovers world wide.

However Bob remains positive and has asked me to post 2 more paintings from the archives.

These are “Blossom”

and

“Blur” both of which are oils on canvas.

More news of Bob will be posted the moment it becomes available. Meanwhile Bob has asked me to thank all his fans for their messages of support.

Vanbear7

p.p. Curly Bob

Curly Bob Has Been Kidnapped !

Readers of Curly Bob’s blog will be shocked to hear that we have received a message from the British Consulate in Mexico City saying Bob’s party of bears were kidnapped at gunpoint during their excursion into the Yucatan jungle earlier this week.

Initial reports were lacking in detail. When I called the Consulate our worst fears were confirmed. Bob and his fellow travellers are being held hostage by a fiendish group of bandits known throughout the Yucatan as Las Patas Negras (The Black Paws), who will stop at nothing to achieve their aims.

Apparently they have a dreadful reputation for smuggling honey, chocolate and ice cream across the Mexican border. There are hundreds of police and soldiers combing the jungle for Bob and his pals.

The nation and bear lovers everywhere  hold their breath hoping for Bob’s safe return.  He is a born survivor which makes me optimistic. He once spent weeks in a bin bag, when we were having some building work done. He emerged unscathed apart from his battered pride and his fur ruffled a bit.

I am certain he would wish me to carry on his good work so I have chosen to publish 2 more works from the archive which I hope will meet with his approval  and be enjoyed by his growing number of fans worldwide.

The paintings are :-

“Blasted Oak” – Oil on Canvas &

 

“Blood Lust” which is also an Oil on canvas both from circa 2008/9. 

Before he left Bob insisted I keep an accurate record of sales and titles of work as he is normally a very tidy bear. I plan to ring again today for more news.

Vanbear7 p.p. Curly Bob

.

News From Abroad–Bob is heading into the jungle!

There has been a flurry of emails from Bob and several calls. These have been made during what he calls “breakout meetings”. I am not sure exactly what this means but I could here lots of music and the clinking of glasses in the background. I am beginning to suspect that the work to play ratio could be increased somewhat. I have tried to explain to Bob that between answering his calls ,emails  and replying to his ever growing fan club I have very little time for painting and drawing.

I am beginning to regret buying him the specially adapted IPad and IPhone. Another difficulty is that Bob has never been abroad before so the concept of time zones is a mystery to him.  He called me at 3.00 a.m. this morning as it was only 8.00 p.m Acapulco time. None of this is helping my artistic output at all.

He told me he is off on an excursion with several other bears who are on the same business seminar. It is to explore the hidden gems of the Mayan civilisation. He thinks it is a good idea to take his camera (also specially adapted) so that the photos will inspire me to paint a new range of paintings when he returns. I warned him that there are snakes (big ones) in the jungle and it is very damp there which will play havoc with his fur.

However Bob is an intrepid bear and not likely to be put off  by giant anacondas or anything else for that matter. I only hope he knows what he is doing. I shall be glad to have him back safe and sound in good old Blighty at the end of next week. I asked him if he had enough insect repellent but he thought the light rum and triple sec in his banana daiquirys would do the job.

Meanwhile he has again signed off with a request for me to publish 2 more paintings. These are “Black Point, Penmon #2 ” – an oil on canvas and ;

 “Blakeney Beach, Norfolk” – a gouache on canvas board. This is the first formal painting in gouache. As always Curly Bob is keen to keep my portfolio  balanced .

Drop by again, for more news of Bob’s progress on his seminar and the results of the expedition into the jungle.

Vanbear7 p.p. Curly Bob

A trip to the airport.

I took Bob to the airport this morning. He didn’t have much luggage with him except for his bear friendly IPad, night cap & pyjama plus a lot of (my) money and 2 credit cards which he says are for overheads???

He also had special non greasy sun block which protects him against fur burn and worse. Bleached ears are a real hazard for bears travelling to sunny climes. His ensemble was completed with a bespoke pair of sun glasses. It added to the air of mystery surrounding him.

I had to explain to the airport staff that Curly Bob was an international celebrity and therefore couldn’t possibly be seen going through the X-Ray machine. In any case it might damage his fur.

On hearing this, the security staff ,who apparently are all avid fans of his blog, waved him through to the V.I.P. entrance and within an hour he was jetting his way to Acapulco.

He will monitor feedback to his blog, my website and posting of  artworks to Google and Flickr via the wifi connection in his Presidential Suite.

In his absence I hope to be able to do some painting between answering memos, replying to his fan mail and posting more artworks.

In fact as I write this a memo has arrive from C.B. directing me to post 2 paintings which are a) Beach Storm (acrylic ink on canvas)

and b) Black Cat (pencil and watercolour).

He feels these will help balance my portfolio. When it comes to honey, ice cream and choice of paintings he is not a bear to be trifled with .

I cannot say when his next post will be or which paintings it will contain. It all depends on how the seminar progresses and how much banana daiquiri he gets through.

Vanbear7 p.p. Curly Bob

Bob Returns!

 

Bob emerged from the Archive this morning. He looked slightly the worse for wear

being covered in dust and cobwebs.
He had to prepare and pack for his forthcoming (and somewhat obscure) business

seminar. He tells me it is specifically designed for entrepreneurial bears like him

who are trying to make an impact on big business. His ambitions are boundless but he

feels promoting my art around the world will add to his CVU(corriculum vitae ursus).

The course is the only one he could find and it it is in Acapulco for 2 weeks,

(neither of which surprise me at all). He felt is would be essential for him to

attend and travel first class. This befits his status as a professional bear.

When I challenged him about the cost he reminded me that he went to Blackpool last

year in a carrier bag which he blames for the abject lack of sales since then.Anyway
Bob says it will be well worth the expense, especially as he isn't paying for it!

While away he has given me a list of works that I should be publishing in his

absence. The first 2 of which are both oils on canvas and are called

Barn, Andalucia

and;

Beach Scene, Portugal

More to follow in the next few days.

Vanbear7 p.p. Curly Bob

He’s Back Tomorrow!

Whilst passing the door to the archive I found a scribbled note from CB. I could tell from the bear like handwriting and it was in pencil. He uses a jumbo triangular one that is easier to grip in his paws.  He never uses a pen of any description to avoid getting ink on his fur. That would be a disaster as it would require a trip to the bath, or worse still,  the washing machine. No self respecting bear is going to agree to an 800rpm spin followed by being pegged on the washing line by his ears.

When I had moved all the empty honey jars and ice cream cartons I could see these 2 works he wants to be published.

“Anger” – an Oil on Canvas 2009. He says this is the last abstract for a few days as he thinks my portfolio is becoming slightly out of balance.

For that reason, he has included “Au Pied des Alpilles”, an oil on canvas from 2012 which he thinks will balance things out a bit. It was based on a postcard  from Provence when Bob was kind enough to let us  holiday with  him in Southern France. He likes bright colours so there will be more like this in the coming months.

Anyway he expects to be back with us tomorrow as he will have finished  off his audit by then.  I shall also receive my instructions as to what I should be painting over the coming weeks. He certainly never lets the grass grow under his paws.

Vanbear7

p.p. Curly Bob