Season’s Greetings To All Bob’s Fans!

Bob has asked me to convey his very best wishes to you all at the beginning of the festive period. His absence has been caused by personal problems which are now behind him hopefully. As soon as the bill for his extended stay in a famous rehab’ clinic have been paid I am told there will be money available for canvases and art materials.

Bob has plans of his own in paw but he has promised that he will offer guidance to develop my career as an artist. I have to admit that he has been spot on in his decisions on all art related matters. I would only consider his judgement to be “iffy” when it comes to almost everything else.

Bob has now abstained from alcohol for nearly a year and his binges on honey & ice cream are now few and far between. I am fascinated as to what his plans are but he has not shared these with me or anyone else as far as I know. He has been online, with my credit card,  several times this week but as he has his own account I don’t know what he has been buying. However he assures me all will be well.

Meanwhile he suggests that I start posting my work on a regular basis. Therefore here is “First Snow, Tryfan “, a work in oil from 2013 when we had a short break in North Wales. Bob felt it was quite appropriate given the weather.

We hope to see you all in 2015.

Christmas Comes But Twice A Year!!

I had heard nothing about Curly Bob's whereabouts for a long time and I was beginning to despair of ever seeing him again.

No doubt Bob's ever loyal fans will be as delighted as I was last Sunday morning. I was having my mid morning siesta following my daily workout(Doctor's orders unfortunately), when there was a loud knock at the door. The courier driver said he could barely lift the box and would I mind helping him carry it over the doorstep. After some difficulty the box was carried into the hallway. I couldn't help but notice the noise of glass bottles coming from within.

As I examined the box more carefully I saw it was marked "Very Fragile" and "This Way Up!" all over it. Strangely enough it was full of holes which had been made all over the box. After opening the lid I tipped it up a little and then a bit further resulting in an avalanche of empty beer, wine and pop bottles, ice cream cartons and honey jars(all empty). As I rummaged through the mountain of debris out popped Curly Bob!

Further rummaging revealed another bear who was introduced  as Da Vinci Bear. Apparently he was an emerging talent who Bob has taken in paw. They had met in one of Bob's many visits to bars, cafes and parties in Montmartre. Speaking of bars they both looked very much worse for wear and reeked of alcohol. Apparently Bob had arranged to have himself and DVB mailed to me to avoid "potentially embarrassing questions by the French Customs  authorities"( more like arrest and subsequent deportation..Ed).

Anticipating the efficiency of the French postal system Bob had packed a few extra supplies which was just as well because he has been missing in transit for over 2 months. Despite protestations to the contrary I put them both in the shower and after they had dried off they went straight to Bob's bedroom where his pile of Christmas presents were still unopened.

When he had thanked me for them we celebrated his safe return with yet another party. I managed to capture this snap of Curly Bob during the festivities .

However Bob was very mindful of how much time had elapsed since my last painting had been published. Wasting no more time he directed me to post "Hope #1", an oil on canvas from way back in my "pre Bob " period, to get things back on track.

"Hope #1", oil on canvas.

Disparu!!

As reported in my last missive, Curly Bob was thought to be on his way back home. However this  was not supported by any hard facts and in particular how he would manage to reach the U.K. without being arrested again for breaching the terms of his release from Avignon prison.

Apparently Paris is having an election to appoint a new Mayor. The 2 main contenders are both local women who are, like all Parisiennes, both intelligent and beautiful. Given Curly Bob's immense popularity and charm & savoir faire (Is this the same bear we are talking about? - Ed), both of the candidates have been seeking Bob's endorsement.

Rather than have to disappoint either of them he decided it was time to come home. Informed sources claim a cunning plan has been hatched to enable Bob to avoid the clutches of the Gendarmerie and paparazzi plus negotiate the hazards of Customs without his passport. Readers will remember it was confiscated following his arrest in the South of France.

Meanwhile his Christmas presents remain unopened under the tree which I have not had the heart to take down ( Gulp again!)
It remains to be seen whether this plot is successful. If it is, I don't know whether I will give him a hug or wring his neck!

One thing is for sure none of this has distracted Bob from his life mission. Before leaving Paris he emailed to ask me to post " Grasses in The Sun", oil on canvas from 2008.

Still Missing

.Hopes of having Curly Bob back home have been dashed yet again reliable sources in Paris(i.e. in the same bar) have confirmed Bob is alive and well but not yet ready to come home. Actually he is ready to come back due to a lack of cash but the Gendarmerie are still scouring the streets and bars looking for him.

The place just doesn't seem the same without him. I often pass his room and look in somehow expecting to see him there.

I have kept nearly everything as it was when he left for France. His little bed is next to the bookshelf containing all his well pawed bedtime stories (gulp). There is a poster above his bed of his all time hero, Yogi Bear and on the other side a poster inviting all bears to come to Jellstone Park. His stock of Koala Brothers DVD's are stacked next to his tv with bear friendly remote control (sniff).

It is true I cleared up all the empty honey pots under the bed and other evidence of numerous midnight feasts of which all bears are so fond.

At first it was a relief to have Bob away for a while. I took the opportunity to refit my studio and order art materials. I was even able to do some painting. Bob has never really grasped the concept that, to donate works to charity fundraising, somebody has to actually paint them in the first place.

Given the number of sightings of Bob , exclusively in bars, it is no wonder that many of the gendarmes allegedly searching for Bob are volunteers!Unconfirmed reports of late night parties in the Pigalle area of Monmartre, Paris suggest all is well with the curly one. I am not sure if it is the lure of hanging out with artistic degenerates or the rather exotic night life, (Probably both - Ed).

Anyway I expect him to come home to soon as he will want to celebrate his 2000th fan club member and 3000 hits on his blog. Both targets are expected to be reached before the end of next week.

As always, Bob has his paw on the wheel and has asked me to post "George" a work in graphite pencil on cartridge paper from my early days before he adopted me.

Still Missing!

Curly Bob is still A.W.O.L. but I am not unduly worried. I have tracked his IPad to a very exclusive part of Paris. The absence of any demands for money and/or any goings on in the City of Light suggest that Bob is behaving himself, at least for now.(That will be a first - Ed) 

The local papers carry headlines such as "Ou est Monsieur Le Bob?" or "Curly Bob Est Disparu!" but apart from that very little else. 

I suspect Bob is lying low until the heat dies down and then he will quietly make his reappearance in the U.K. Bob is not well known for subtlety or tact(They are not qualities with which Bob has ever been blessed-Ed)but he does have charm in abundance. This probably accounts for why he has never been found in a pool of kapok with his throat cut.

All I receive from him is a stream of terse instructions, via his specially adapted IPad, as to what I must do. The latest one bids me to post "Flooded Forest", an oil on board from the vaults.

The Bear Vanishes!

Just when I thought we were going to have Curly Bob back home safe and sound he has disappeared again. It seems he caught the TGV from Avignon but never arrived in Paris. The Gendarmerie are combing the streets of Paris as they do not believe he got off the train in between there and Avignon as the train doesn't stop between the two cities.

S.N.C.F. staff took the train to pieces starting with the most likely places (i.e. the bars- Ed) he was last seen in a buffet bar in 1st class regaling the crowd of onlookers and fans with his adventures. Several of them were journalists hoping for an exclusive interview. His witty dialogue was lubricated with copious free drinks and honey cocktails.

Everyone present does not remembers seeing him or anything else by the time the train reached Paris due to the excess of alcohol consumed by the happy gathering.

It is said the Gendarmerie have been told to locate Bob so they can make sure he actually leaves the country via Eurostar and doesn't embarrass the French government any further.

I received a missive from Bob a few minutes telling me not to worry and that he was safe and in good company.(this has to be in a honey den, bar or with a blonde or possibly all three!). As always, Bob knows his loyal fans are waiting for his next epic installment, so he has asked me to have me publish "Fence Post #1", a charcoal study.

More on his antics as soon as we know where he is.....

Scandal in Paris!

At last, the intense media speculation concerning Curly Bob's "punitive" prison regime has proved too much for the French Government. A reliable source inside the Elysee Palace has disclosed that they could not be seen to admit to this so a cover story was needed to divert attention from Bob.

Last week they "leaked" a story concerning the French President. Allegedly he had been spotted making trips to a notorious "boite d'or( A honey den disguised as a night club nightclub) near to the Elysee Palace in Paris.

Apparently he has been accompanied by a massive brute of a bodyguard who is also quite partial to a spoonful or two of Yucatan Gold or Orange Blossom Honey!

Clearly this state of affairs could not continue. The Prime Minister has repeatedly stated that his level of honey consumption is a private matter but this did not satisfy the press.

French journalists have explained to me that the French public is far more tolerant of such goings on than here in the U.K. They are far more concerned about the state of the French economy and in particular the shortages of honey which has pushed the street price through the roof. The average Frenchman or woman has had to resort to using sugar in their tea and coffee("Ughh" - Curly Bob). Bears all over France are threatening to take to the streets.

Therefore Curly Bob has had his community service order quashed, allegedly for good behavior. He was bundled out of pokey late last night and was fairly disgruntled because he had missed his bedtime story!

He was whisked away by car to an unknown destination sporting his favourite R.N.L.I. sweater and IPad tucked under his paw. Needless to say Bob was not allowed to comment to the press camped outside the prison.

I have been informed that once his documents are in order he will be free to leave (more like deported- Ed) and we shall have him safely back at home. Hopefully I can then get back to some painting. Speaking of which, I have instructions to post "Farmhouse, Grotte, Sicily #2" a watercolour from 2006. 

Rumours of Imminent Release

Sources from inside Avignon Prison strongly suggest that our hero will be parting company with the prison and Happy bees Honey Farm in the very near future.

Needless to say I do not wish to raise false hopes, especially among Bob's younger readers but let's just say a party is being planned.

Pending further developments Bob has asked me to post "Farm House, Grotte, Sicily #1, oil on canvas from 2004"

Curious Events At The Prison!

Curly Bob’s avid fans will be surprised, (or not as the case may be), to hear that the prison where Bob is currently serving his community service order has been the subject of several attempted break ins.

Official sources were saying very little yesterday. However one of our contacts inside the jail confirmed numerous bears has been arrested while trying to get inside the prison. It is thought they were honey addicts who can be spotted easily by their glazed eyes and craving for anything vaguely resembling honey. They can become desperate characters when deprived of their daily fix and are a great nuisance to bee keepers all over France.

Sounds of digging were heard within the prison last night. The C.R.S.,( a well known bunch of heavies & thugs in uniform)were summoned immediately. 

At 2 a.m. CET a gang of professional honey robbers,(bears one & all)  were arrested as they emerged from their tunnel under the prison wall. A desperate struggle ensued with bits of fur flying everywhere. It transpired they were the dreaded outfit known as “Les Pates D’Or” (lit “The Golden Paws”). An evil bunch from the roughest toy shops in the backstreets of Marseille. Their name is derived from their love of amber coloured honey or any other for that matter.

Our source also confirms the French authorities are reconsidering their position regarding the deterrent nature of the prison regime across France in the light of these developments. Apparently one suggestion was to withdraw the provision of honey, ice cream etc and cancel all bed time stories from French jails but this was dismissed for fear of rioting.

Another answer might be to grant Bob an early release, ostensibly on the grounds of good behaviour, thus removing the glare of publicity from the prison regime. This is being considered as we speak.

During this furore, Bob is , as always, completely oblivious to all these concerns. He continues with his duties at the Happy bees Honey Farm. We didn’t get him home for Christmas after all but we are hopeful he will be back with us soon.

Meanwhile he has emailed to wish all his fans a Happy/Honey New Year and  requested I post “Farmhouse in the Luberon #4”, an oil from 2012.