One night in the middle of our holiday in the South of France we were woken up by the sound of someone tapping softly on our bedroom window. Initially I assumed it was a bird or other small animal then I remembered we were on the 4th floor. As I drew the curtains imagine my astonishment to see Bob dangling from a rope of knotted bed sheets. At first I thought he was escaping from a fire of from hordes of his fans.
However, the shameful truth was that Bob had run out of money. The hotel management had asked for settlement of the substantial (i.e. enormous) bar and room bill first thing the next morning or the Gendarmes would be summoned.(Cripes!) I said I would pay settle them with my credit cards but Bob told me not to bother because they had already been refused for exceeding their credit limits.
Given the desperate situation and risk to his international reputation I agreed to allow him to hide in my art satchel until we reached the rail station but after that he would have to act independently.(he would have shown up on the security X - Ray at Eurostar in Paris.)
We went on a trip to a local village and smuggled him out past a very unhappy hotel manager who looked very unhappy as he spoke to someone on the phone repeating the phrase "disparu!, disparu!" As we walked past some of the hotel bears sat on a shelf I noted they looked particularly bleary eyed, no doubt after a farewell party.
We left him at the rail station and said our farewells. I wasn't unduly concerned as Bob is a seasoned traveler and can cope with most situations especially as I gave him a substantial amount of our remaining Euros.
Our day passed very pleasantly but on our return to the hotel we were astonished to see Bob's mugshot on posters plastered all over the town. At the hotel we were met by the hotel manager and two of France's finest who wanted to know Bob's whereabouts. We feigned surprise but the rope of bed sheets outside of our bedroom window was a fatal flaw in our story. The bracelets were then slapped on us and within seconds we were being driven to the local pokey(prison to our readers abroad..Ed) We were charged with aiding and abetting a fugitive.
While languishing in my cell I was allowed to keep my I Pad(very liberal these French jails!). Bob tweeted me from somewhere in Provence and told me not to worry and to post the following painting "Dolpadarn Castle, Llanberis " - an oil on canvas. I replied to tell Bob that the only worry was that I was going to wring his neck if I ever regained my freedom!
However, the shameful truth was that Bob had run out of money. The hotel management had asked for settlement of the substantial (i.e. enormous) bar and room bill first thing the next morning or the Gendarmes would be summoned.(Cripes!) I said I would pay settle them with my credit cards but Bob told me not to bother because they had already been refused for exceeding their credit limits.
Given the desperate situation and risk to his international reputation I agreed to allow him to hide in my art satchel until we reached the rail station but after that he would have to act independently.(he would have shown up on the security X - Ray at Eurostar in Paris.)
We went on a trip to a local village and smuggled him out past a very unhappy hotel manager who looked very unhappy as he spoke to someone on the phone repeating the phrase "disparu!, disparu!" As we walked past some of the hotel bears sat on a shelf I noted they looked particularly bleary eyed, no doubt after a farewell party.
We left him at the rail station and said our farewells. I wasn't unduly concerned as Bob is a seasoned traveler and can cope with most situations especially as I gave him a substantial amount of our remaining Euros.
Our day passed very pleasantly but on our return to the hotel we were astonished to see Bob's mugshot on posters plastered all over the town. At the hotel we were met by the hotel manager and two of France's finest who wanted to know Bob's whereabouts. We feigned surprise but the rope of bed sheets outside of our bedroom window was a fatal flaw in our story. The bracelets were then slapped on us and within seconds we were being driven to the local pokey(prison to our readers abroad..Ed) We were charged with aiding and abetting a fugitive.
While languishing in my cell I was allowed to keep my I Pad(very liberal these French jails!). Bob tweeted me from somewhere in Provence and told me not to worry and to post the following painting "Dolpadarn Castle, Llanberis " - an oil on canvas. I replied to tell Bob that the only worry was that I was going to wring his neck if I ever regained my freedom!
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